Monday, February 23, 2009

The Hormone Guide








Women will understand this!

Men should memorize it!

Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS, SAFER, SAFEST, ULTRA SAFE,

What's for dinner? Can I help you with dinner? Where would you like to go for dinner?

Here, have some wine.

Are you wearing that? Wow, you sure look good in brown! WOW! Look at you!

Here, have some wine.

What are you so worked up about? Could we be overreacting? Here's my paycheck.

Here, have some wine.

Should you be eating that? You know, there are a lot of apples left. Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?

Here, have some wine.

What did you DO all day? I hope you didn't over-do it today. I've always loved you in that robe!

Here, have some wine.

What PMS Stands For:

1. Pass My Shotgun

2. Psychotic Mood Shift

3. Perpetual Munching Spree

4. Puffy Mid-Section

5. People Make me Sick

6. Provide Me with Sweets

7. Pardon My Sobbin

8. Pimples May Surface

9. Pass My Sweatpants

10. Pissy Mood Syndrome

11. Plainly, Men Stink

12. Pack My Stuff

13. Potential Murder Suspect

6 comments:

Unknown said...

Haha, I love it!
My fav tho.. Putting up with Men's S*@t

Anonymous said...

Hahaha. I've seen this before, but it's still funny! I love the Potential Murder Suspect one. :-)

Kate

Periwinkle Paisley said...

LOL! Always funny because it's true!

w said...

hahhaahah! you made me laugh. and not many people can do that. well. ok. i laugh at everything. but. i don't always mean it.

i meant it this time.

Be Jeweled By Candi said...

OMG, this is hilarious and so VERY true!!

Jezebel said...

haha HILARIOUS. I'm such a wine monster at that time of the month...